Meg Ryan directs herself, David Duchovny and Hal Liggett in this romcom where two long separated lovers touch base in an airport waiting for connecting flights.
There’s not much to this stilted, talky two-hander apart from a pair of stars who we have a fair deal of long term affection for sparring and reconciling. The potential is there. Could have been great.
5
Perfect Double Bill: Addicted To Love (1997)
Monte Hellman directs Warren Oates, Harry Dean Stanton and Patricia Pearcy in this independent drama where a down-on-his-luck cockfighter takes a vow of silence until he can train a tournament winning bird.
Banned in the U.K. because of its continual cruelty to animals, this popped up on Tubi recently. I gritted my teeth and watched solely as I love Warren Oates. Macho character study a-go-go, scruffy edition. This does exactly what it says on the tin. While you get a real behind the scene tour of the bloodsport circuit there isn’t really a compelling 90 minutes of story or development here. More a hangout movie where lots of living things fight to the death or are maimed by the owners for petty reasons. Ugh.
5
Perfect Double Bill: Two-Lane Blacktop (1971)
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Frank Darabont directs Tom Hanks, David Morse and Michael Clarke Duncan in this magical realist prison drama where a guard on death row begins to suspect a convicted child killer is not just innocent but a miraculous healer.
Stephen King was subtly moving away from pure horror throughout the Nineties. In 1998 he took his biggest gamble by publishing a Dickens-esque Depression era drama one novella length chapter a month over a full year. At the same time, Frank Darabont’s adaptation of King’s The Shawshank Redemption had shaken off its flop Oscar bait status to be considered an (almost) instant modern classic. To this day it remains many people’s favourite film. Darabont’s return to that well with The Green Mile is a classy, prestigious affair. Hanks was a firmly established A-List megastar by this juncture, any project he put his name to felt exciting. The movie hits many of the same sentimental but harshly tough notes as its forerunner. Expectations were higher and the messaging is far more sentimental, obviously manipulative and repetitive. Where The Shawshank Redemption races through decades at a clip only comparable to Goodfellas, The Green Mile stays still in one spot rubbing its uncamouflaged pseudo Christ allegories in your face whether you bite or not. If you are a non believer the last hour is a slog. I appreciated it more on this belated revisit, wrapped up in the duvet on the sofa one winter morning with the cat napping at my feet. But it isn’t a patch on the humanist Shawshank, just very blatantly cut from the same cloth. At least Sam Rockwell turns up in the middle hour to inject the affair with a bit of zany nasty.
6
Perfect Double Bill: 3 hours and 9 minutes set mainly in the same jail house corridor. I’m full!
Dennis Donnelly directs Cameron Mitchell, Pamelyn Ferdin and Wesley Eure in this exploitation flick recreating the allegedly true story of a spree killing in an apartment complex.
A filthy mix of The Town That Dreaded Sundown, Halloween and Psycho. The first act is the most slasher orientated. It becomes a strangely ambitious film but also a less satisfying genre flick the deeper we go. Essentially a roughie. There is a gratuitous five minute bathtime masturbation sequence that is blatant softcore porn, effectively so, if it weren’t for the fact the horny honey is doomed before she starts running the taps. Red paint kills with lots of improvised weapons followed by a modern gothic potboiler. Balaclavas at the ready.
6
Perfect Double Bill: Maniac (1980)
I write regular features about live comedy for British Comedy Guide here https://www.comedy.co.uk/people/bobby_carroll/features/ and my own Substack https://substack.com/@edinburghlaughterbulletin
Ted Demme directs Eddie Murphy, Martin Lawrence and Bernie Mac in this comedy period prison drama where two mismatched young black men are sent to the chain gang together for a crime they did not commit.
Soft and unfussy, this isn’t by any definition a great film but it does plenty right. Eddie back on slick motormouth hustler mode. Martin Lawrence’s least grating lead role. A solid support cast. Demme’s much missed flair for maximising the chemistry in ensemble performances. Rick Baker unmatchable ageing prosthetics. A fair amount of heart. Decent soundtrack. The kinda forgotten release that’ll never be anyone’s favourite movie but equally will entertain even the most hardened cynic.
6
Perfect Double Bill: Harlem Nights (1989)
George A. Romero directs John Amplas, Lincoln Maazel and Christine Forrest in this horror drama where a young man believes himself to be a vampire.
Almost a sub genre in and of itself the old ‘Mentally Ill Or Creature Of The Night’. Martin is sleazy and bitty. There are compelling moments, usually his long drawn out attacks on women which are as sad as they are chaotic. This story is only ever really going one way and it often stretches the patience a fair bit. Romero does a good job to keep the mystery alive on a shoestring… Even Martin’s black and white flashback to his vampire origins could be his own delusions.
5
Perfect Double Bill: Willard (1971)
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Laura Wandel directs Maya Vanderbeque, Günter Doret and Karim Leklou in this Belgian drama about a cycle of primary school bullying told from the point of view of a nervous seven year old girl.
About as good as this type of film is going to get. You can’t fault it. Wandel achieves her mission. Sadly accurate, so you also wouldn’t want to endure it twice.
6
Perfect Double Bill: The Teacher’s Lounge (2024)
Michael Caton-Jones directs Bruce Willis, Richard Gere and Sidney Poitier in this remake of the 1973 film The Day of the Jackal, which was based on the 1971 novel of the same name by Frederick Forsyth.
A flat modernisation. Some scenes have a TV movie cheapness, others go all out with CGI which weakens the action. Denuded of its “true story” terse appeal this didn’t really need to keep The Jackal branding. A few story beats are retained but it could just as easily been a Clint sequel to In The Line Of Fire. Gere’s choice to play his proactive fink as an IRA political prisoner rings false in a number of ways. Willis is fine value as the reptilian, shape shifting killer. There’s a good movie here, and they already made it in the Seventies.
4
Perfect Double Bill: Striking Distance (1993)
I write regular features about live comedy for British Comedy Guide here https://www.comedy.co.uk/people/bobby_carroll/features/ and my own Substack https://substack.com/@edinburghlaughterbulletin
“I Got Invited To The Christmas Party By Mistake. Who Knew?”
The Shop Around The Corner (1940) 👍
It’s A Wonderful Life (1946) 👍👍
Miracle on 34th Street (1947) 👍
Holiday Affair (1949)
A Christmas Carol (1951)
One Hundred And One Dalmatians (1961) 👍👍
How The Grinch Stole Christmas! (1966)
On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (1969) 👍👍
Scrooge (1970)
The French Connection (1971) 👍👍
3 Days Of the Condor (1975) 👍👍
The Snowman (1982)
Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984)
A Christmas Carol (1984)
Santa Claus: The Movie (1985) 👍
National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation (1989)
Die Hard 2: Die Harder (1990) 👍👍
A Muppet Christmas Carol (1992) 👍
Home Alone 2: Lost In New York (1992)
Tim Burton’s The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993) 👍👍
The Santa Clause (1994)
Miracle On 34th Street (1994)
While You Were Sleeping (1995)
The Long Kiss Goodnight (1996) 👍
Eyes Wide Shut (1999)
How The Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)
Love Actually (2003)
Tokyo Godfathers (2003)
The Polar Express (2004)
Christmas With The Kranks (2004)
Fred Claus (2007)
Four Christmases (2008)
A Christmas Carol (2009)
Nativity! (2009)
Arthur Christmas (2011)
The Night Before (2015)
Office Christmas Party (2016)
The Man Who Invented Christmas (2017)
Feast Of The Seven Fishes (2018)
The Christmas Chronicles (2018)
The Nutcracker and the Four Realms (2018)
Klaus (2019)
I’m Thinking Of Ending Things (2020)
Falling For Christmas (2022)
Silent Night (2023)
Terrifier 3 (2024)
Stephen Herek directs Keanu Reeves, Alex Winter and George Carlin in this sci-fi teen comedy where two loveable airheads travel through time in a phone booth to pass their history final.
This could have easily been the Mac & Me to Back To The Future’s E.T. A cheap cash-in, with ropey FX and a jobbing director. Instead it becomes something unimpeachably special through sheer innocence and joy. More apiece with the grungy / Generation X / lo-fi / end of history nineties. These aren’t goal orientated temporal racers. They do not disrupt reality or need to fix the timeline. They are relaxed pals who are “just dust in the wind, dude!” Zero footprint daytrippers. Apart from the casting coup of a pre-fame cusping Keanu, what Bill & Ted 1 has in spades is unfussy charm. Of course, every historical figure they borrow automatically trusts them and just goes along with it. Of course, Napoleon would be a buzzkill at ice cream parlours, bowling alleys and water parks. Of course, they’d all be arrested if you let them loose on a Californian mall. Bill & Ted is a celebration of just being nice and caring and open. They aren’t smartest guys in the time slip but they are the biggest hearts. That wins the day, gets the A grade and ultimately changes our future into being a utopia. A movie without villains, minimal action or romance. Instead a fun soundtrack, a hundred great quotes and Amy Stotch as Missy. “Be excellent to each other… And party on, dudes!”
8
Perfect Double Bill: Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey (1991)
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Bobby Carroll's Movie Diary 