Bobby Carroll's Movie Diary

François Ozon directs Charlotte Rampling, Ludivine Sagnier and Charles Dance in this erotic thriller where a British mystery author visits her publisher’s home in the South of France only for his gatecrashing daughter to create tensions both sexual and deadly.

I loved this when it came out. It has aged like fine vintage wine on a belated revisit. The lush hazy, horniness of it all. Sunday afternoon delight. French V English. Young V Old. Conservative V Le Super Cool Pop. Sunhats V Tiny Bikinis. Possibly the most erotic film ever made and up there with probably my favourite erotic thrillers. (Blue Velvet / Dead Calm / Basic Instinct). The dreamlike mystery element is faded into the background. This is a two hander where two gorgeous cult performers go at it. Part rivalry, part reverse psychology seduction. I love how sad sack sleazy all of Sagnier’s conquests are. She could have anyone! Like she is rubbing her shitty choices in Rampling’s face like an insult. What is Ozon trying to say about straight masculine sexuality? Clearly this is CIS Het fantasy told through a young gay man’s perceptions…

10

Perfect Double Bill: When Fall Is Coming (2024)

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Damian McCarthy directs Adam Scott, Peter Coonan and David Wilmot in this Irish horror where a depressed author goes to scatter his parents ashes at the creepy hotel where they spent their honeymoon.

Very much my jam. A maze location, sinister set design, Stephen King tribute moves. Oodles of clues and puzzles and wrong turns and “Don’t do THAT!”s. Scott finds himself in a quicksand of mysteries, each one as lethal and traumatic as the next. A nexus of locked door suffering that recalls In The Mouth Of Madness, Hellraiser and Barton Fink. Just a low key thrill-o-matic. Love the fetid, whiskey barrel woody look of this one too.

8

Perfect Double Bill: The Hallow (2015)

Mark Jenkin directs George MacKay, Callum Turner and Emily Daglish-Laine in this time warp drama where a mysterious fishing boat returns to a village 30 years after vanishing and two men join its crew hoping for better fortune. 

Feels like a cult novella. Probably Jenkin’s most accessible work to date but still niche, parochial and pleasingly bonkers. Grittily beautiful.

7

Perfect Double Bill: Bait (2019)

I write regular features about live comedy for British Comedy Guide here https://www.comedy.co.uk/people/bobby_carroll/features/ and my own Substack https://substack.com/@edinburghlaughterbulletin

David Lowery directs Anne Hathaway, Michaela Coel and Hunter Schafer in this drama where a pop siren revisits a ruined friendship under the pretext of creating an iconic stage costume.

Plays very much like one of those filmed plays Sidney Lumet used to churn out between bigger projects. Stilted dialogue, zero chemistry and undefined relationship don’t help. The concert scenes are beautiful. There are two memorable set pieces; a silent dance and a seance. Otherwise, frustrating and unengaging.

4

Perfect Double Bill: Serenity (2019)

Baltasar Kormákur directs Charlize Theron, Taron Egerton and Eric Bana in this Aussie thriller where a grieving widow finds herself being hunted in the wilderness.

A solid revival of the yuppie-in-peril tropes which simultaneously continues Kormákur’s love of putting movie stars in deep shit in extreme nature (Everest, Beast). A two hander with sterling genre work for both its stars. Great Saturday night fodder and very handsome. For once Netflix’s formula of mandatory drone establishing shots and obnoxious needle drops pay off.

7

Perfect Double Bill: Everest (2015)

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Alonso Ruizpalacios directs Raúl Briones, Rooney Mara and Anna Díaz in this drama set in a Times Square kitchen, dreams and desperation collide as the immigrant staff each chase the elusive American dream.

A day in the life of labyrinth of a New York back of house. Mainly B&W which isn’t the only touchstone with French classic toughie La Haine. This is a motley crew of people on the peripheries of society trying to navigate city life, immigrant life and capitalist exploitation. There are thrusts of magical realism and time outs that feel like their own breathing space short films. Rooney Mara is fantastic as a waitress with a big decision. Sexual and racial tension simmer and explode throughout. Was a casual morning off watch for this guy, one which hooked me in fully.

8

Perfect Double Bill: La Haine (1995)

Michael Lehmann directs Bruce Willis, Danny Aiello and Andie MacDowell in this meta action comedy where a cat burglar gets trapped in a caper between the Vatican, the CIA and two eccentric millionaires.

A folly. Kicked to death on release. But also ahead of its time and a giddy rollercoaster ride of smirk. There are two ways to approach the cult of Hudson Hawk. A few beers in and let the hubristic relentless smarm wash over you. Or with intense concentration as within the garish hyperactivity there are gags so intricate and delicate that they only make sense on a third or fourth watch. I promise you even the second or third time I watched this I couldn’t tell you why Andie MacDowell was talking like a dolphin. There are absolute glories scattered about – David Caruso’s mime henchman, the timing of the heists to show tunes, Richard E Grant and Sandra Bernhard’s maniacal exposition spitters, “Airbags! Can you fucking believe it?”. It is a balls out, middle finger up to the blockbuster formula made with blockbuster money. Does it need to make sense if it moves this fast? Do you need snappy one liner when every meta gag is a work of precision? Does a Bruce Willis summer release need to be gritty to work? Let the biggest star in Hollywood in his day raise his eyebrow at you for two epileptic hours. Moonlighting remade with brightly coloured action dolls.

7

Perfect Double Bill: Money Train (1995)

I write regular features about live comedy for British Comedy Guide here https://www.comedy.co.uk/people/bobby_carroll/features/ and my own Substack https://substack.com/@edinburghlaughterbulletin

Stephen Carpenter and Jeffrey Obrow directs Suzy Stokey, Warren Lincoln and Lisa Erickson in this horror about a small, clay Aztec doll with darkly mystical properties.

Filmed on a shoestring aside from some OK bladder make-up effect transformation work. Starring a sweaty weasel guy who never did much again, plus a bunch of hotties. This takes ages to settle into its “toxic male corrupted by evil” plot line. Three prologues to start (were these abandoned projects?), a Scooby Doo gang teen subplot… and by the end we still never really find out what the power is? Why do people become obsessed with it? Forget it, Jake… it’s bottom shelf VHS rental fodder.

3

Perfect Double Bill: The Initiation (1984)

Steve Oedekerk directs Jim Carrey, Ian McNeice and Simon Callow in this comedy sequel where Ace goes to Africa to find a sacred bat.

A disappointment. Filler montages and Carrey on autopilot. The Cliffhanger spoof at the start is as good as it gets. Alrighty-then!

5

Perfect Double Bill: Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994)

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Kinka Usher directs Ben Stiller, William H. Macy and Hank Azaria in this superhero spoof where a group of inept amateur vigilantes with dubious powers must try to save the day when a supervillain threatens to destroy the city.

A cult favourite that is just a little too repetitive and indulgent to be a rewatchable. The first half introducing everyone is far superior to the stretched out finale. Though the Invisible Boy sequence is a fantastic gag. The production design impressively matches any mid Nineties mega budgeted comic book folly.

6

Perfect Double Bill: Super Mario Bros. (1993)