Ronald Neame directs Gene Hackman, Ernest Borgnine and Shelley Winters in this sinking ship disaster movie produced by the master of the genre Irwin Allen.

Gene Hackman made plenty of action flicks that just happened to be set over Christmas. This one actually takes place on New Years Eve, a festive tree is used as an improvised ladder and he plays a bolshy, turtleneck sporting priest. 75% of The Poseidon Adventure is Hollywood has-beens screaming at each other, drenched in sweat and seawater, populating obvious faked upside down passageway soundstages. I love it. The loudness. The griminess. The regular kills. The philosophical arguments. It is a big, big, big entertainment with just enough gruff grit to feel like it is saying something more. More than let’s flood this set, then blow this set up and feed one more Hollywood also-ran to the meat grinder.

10

Perfect Double Bill: The Towering Inferno (1974)

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Kenji Kamiyama directs Gaia Wise, Brian Cox and Luca Pasqualino in this animated fantasy prequel set 200 years before Bilbo found the one ring in Gollum’s cave.

Very beautiful but the pace is stately. This can often feel fatal when the second half is a stalemate siege.

6

Perfect Double Bill: The Black Cauldron (1985)

Marielle Heller directs Amy Adams, Scoot McNairy and Jessica Harper in this black comedy where a mother feels her life is spiralling out of control to the point where she might be transforming into a dog after hours.

Ultimately an unashamed showcase for the always overqualified Adams. Feels very much like an adaptation of something that worked better as a literary exercise. There are wounding laughs and honest moments… excellent dog and toddler sequences. The feminist empowerment threads don’t bring anything particularly new to the table but Adams takes a fair amount of risk with her glamorous awards darling status. In all fairness a few extra pounds and some messy hair just makes her look a different brand of hot. Probably the biggest swing Heller has taken so far in her exemplary directorial career yet the least exciting.

6

Perfect Double Bill: Can You Ever Forgive Me? (2018)

I write regular features about live comedy for British Comedy Guide here https://www.comedy.co.uk/people/bobby_carroll/features/ and my own Substack https://substack.com/@edinburghlaughterbulletin

Meg Ryan directs herself, David Duchovny and Hal Liggett in this romcom where two long separated lovers touch base in an airport waiting for connecting flights.

There’s not much to this stilted, talky two-hander apart from a pair of stars who we have a fair deal of long term affection for sparring and reconciling. The potential is there. Could have been great.

5

Perfect Double Bill: Addicted To Love (1997)

Monte Hellman directs Warren Oates, Harry Dean Stanton and Patricia Pearcy in this independent drama where a down-on-his-luck cockfighter takes a vow of silence until he can train a tournament winning bird.

Banned in the U.K. because of its continual cruelty to animals, this popped up on Tubi recently. I gritted my teeth and watched solely as I love Warren Oates. Macho character study a-go-go, scruffy edition. This does exactly what it says on the tin. While you get a real behind the scene tour of the bloodsport circuit there isn’t really a compelling 90 minutes of story or development here. More a hangout movie where lots of living things fight to the death or are maimed by the owners for petty reasons. Ugh.

5

Perfect Double Bill: Two-Lane Blacktop (1971)

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Frank Darabont directs Tom Hanks, David Morse and Michael Clarke Duncan in this magical realist prison drama where a guard on death row begins to suspect a convicted child killer is not just innocent but a miraculous healer.

Stephen King was subtly moving away from pure horror throughout the Nineties. In 1998 he took his biggest gamble by publishing a Dickens-esque Depression era drama one novella length chapter a month over a full year. At the same time, Frank Darabont’s adaptation of King’s The Shawshank Redemption had shaken off its flop Oscar bait status to be considered an (almost) instant modern classic. To this day it remains many people’s favourite film. Darabont’s return to that well with The Green Mile is a classy, prestigious affair. Hanks was a firmly established A-List megastar by this juncture, any project he put his name to felt exciting. The movie hits many of the same sentimental but harshly tough notes as its forerunner. Expectations were higher and the messaging is far more sentimental, obviously manipulative and repetitive. Where The Shawshank Redemption races through decades at a clip only comparable to Goodfellas, The Green Mile stays still in one spot rubbing its uncamouflaged pseudo Christ allegories in your face whether you bite or not. If you are a non believer the last hour is a slog. I appreciated it more on this belated revisit, wrapped up in the duvet on the sofa one winter morning with the cat napping at my feet. But it isn’t a patch on the humanist Shawshank, just very blatantly cut from the same cloth. At least Sam Rockwell turns up in the middle hour to inject the affair with a bit of zany nasty.

6

Perfect Double Bill: 3 hours and 9 minutes set mainly in the same jail house corridor. I’m full!

Dennis Donnelly directs Cameron Mitchell, Pamelyn Ferdin and Wesley Eure in this exploitation flick recreating the allegedly true story of a spree killing in an apartment complex.

A filthy mix of The Town That Dreaded Sundown, Halloween and Psycho. The first act is the most slasher orientated. It becomes a strangely ambitious film but also a less satisfying genre flick the deeper we go. Essentially a roughie. There is a gratuitous five minute bathtime masturbation sequence that is blatant softcore porn, effectively so, if it weren’t for the fact the horny honey is doomed before she starts running the taps. Red paint kills with lots of improvised weapons followed by a modern gothic potboiler. Balaclavas at the ready.

6

Perfect Double Bill: Maniac (1980)

I write regular features about live comedy for British Comedy Guide here https://www.comedy.co.uk/people/bobby_carroll/features/ and my own Substack https://substack.com/@edinburghlaughterbulletin

Ted Demme directs Eddie Murphy, Martin Lawrence and Bernie Mac in this comedy period prison drama where two mismatched young black men are sent to the chain gang together for a crime they did not commit.

Soft and unfussy, this isn’t by any definition a great film but it does plenty right. Eddie back on slick motormouth hustler mode. Martin Lawrence’s least grating lead role. A solid support cast. Demme’s much missed flair for maximising the chemistry in ensemble performances. Rick Baker unmatchable ageing prosthetics. A fair amount of heart. Decent soundtrack. The kinda forgotten release that’ll never be anyone’s favourite movie but equally will entertain even the most hardened cynic.

6

Perfect Double Bill: Harlem Nights (1989)

George A. Romero directs John Amplas, Lincoln Maazel and Christine Forrest in this horror drama where a young man believes himself to be a vampire.

Almost a sub genre in and of itself the old ‘Mentally Ill Or Creature Of The Night’. Martin is sleazy and bitty. There are compelling moments, usually his long drawn out attacks on women which are as sad as they are chaotic. This story is only ever really going one way and it often stretches the patience a fair bit. Romero does a good job to keep the mystery alive on a shoestring… Even Martin’s black and white flashback to his vampire origins could be his own delusions.

5

Perfect Double Bill: Willard (1971)

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Laura Wandel directs Maya Vanderbeque, Günter Doret and Karim Leklou in this Belgian drama about a cycle of primary school bullying told from the point of view of a nervous seven year old girl.

About as good as this type of film is going to get. You can’t fault it. Wandel achieves her mission. Sadly accurate, so you also wouldn’t want to endure it twice.

6

Perfect Double Bill: The Teacher’s Lounge (2024)