Gianfranco Parolini directs Gianni Garko, William Berger and Fernando Sancho in this Spaghetti Western where an angel of vengeance dogs a robber in the middle of an elaborate insurance fraud massacre.

The first Sartana entry has all the right camera angles, sweaty faces, wailing score and rubbery dubbing. If you’ve come for shoot-outs and our protagonist (“hero” might be a lie) appearing in strange corners of rooms out of nowhere, you’ve come to the right shop. Garko’s gimmick is he has a few gadget guns (like an unshaven 007) but he’s no Connery or Clint. Of its time, bog standard product but a product I enjoy immensely… even if this one’s plot is knotted so rigorously you can no longer see the rope.

6

Chang Cheh directs Jimmy Wang, Lisa Chiao Chiao and Tien Feng in this martial arts tale of a disabled warrior whose limitations may liberate his fighting style to defeat his former master’s enemies new lock weapon.

Sweet and colourful. The pacing is off and the fights aren’t going to impress modern eyes. Yet a good solid Shaw Brothers entry.

6

Oliver Stone directs Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Taylor Kitsch and Blake Lively in this starry drug cartel thriller where a Californian threesome find themselves being stepped on by a Mexican kingpin.

Numb leads. Distracted plotting. Frenzied direction. Every time Savages threatens to settle into something compelling, it wanders off in a haphazard direction. Squandering a strong support cast of Benicio, Travolta and Salma. They may be hammy and ill served by stock parts but they remind you of the better movies this isn’t. Way of the Gun, Pulp Fiction or Once Upon a Time in Mexico. You could be having a real good time elsewhere.

4

Chris Smith directs Billy McFarland, Ja Rule and Andy King in this documentary about a high end tropical island music festival sold on Instagram that didn’t exactly deliver on the once in a lifetime experience promised.

A hyperbolic look at a hyperbolic non-event. Are a struggling rapper and a jock turned entrepreneur the biggest fraudsters of their generation? Or people who knew how to sell an idea in the digital age but not how to deliver the infrastructure? I get the feeling the latter is true and most of the ticket buyers seem equally pathetic and useless. The prick who confessed to destroying neighbouring tents so he could have a little bit more shithole than everyone else is more detestable than the yes men, dead eyed models and party bros who destroyed their “reputations” by failing to deliver a Blink-182 gig on Pablo Escobar’s former retreat. These jarbronis are representative of such a small subsection of their generation, rather than indicative so this is an exercise in lightweight schadenfreude, pure and simple. Essentially an amusing anecdote stretched over 90 minutes the highlights involving an exciting bit of bartering for mineral water (no thanks, I’ll keep my Evian!) and Ja Rule screaming like a dictator “If we fuckin wanna go see the pigs, we go see the pigs”. Spoiler warning… Pigs are seen of all sizes.

5

George Cukor directs Judy Garland, James Mason and Jack Carson in this musical remake of the Hollywood romance where one famous husband’s career wanes while his discovery / wife’s flourishes.

Not the original but the best. It mixes cynicism with spectacle beautifully, a real sweet and sour delight of golden age filmmaking. Mason excels as the alcoholic romantic, he has never been better. I feel a cad typing this… Garland maybe is noticeably a decade too old to play the ingenue but her unique cinematic sparkle cannot be diminished. She is simply tremendous in the musical numbers. The version we watched is the slightly Frankensteined edition, where lost scenes are patched together with publicity stills. These moments would have been good cinema if retained but the subplot covered by them is inessential in the grand scheme of things. If you want glitz, tragedy and sweep then Cukor’s A Star is Born is the alternative Hollywood epic of choice. One without a battlefield, loincloth or horse in sight. Get ready to be starstruck!

8

Alan Parker directs Maureen Teefy, Irene Cara, Gene Anthony Ray in this semi-musical look at the pupils of a prestigious New York school of performing arts.

A hit famous for its catchy theme song. Parker immerses us into this world with full pelt energy. The opening breakneck montage of auditions is sustained impressively… a litany of hope, talent and crushing disappointment. That pretty much sets the tone once things slow down. We never settle on characters long enough to really care about them, and their futures are left pointedly but frustratingly unrealised. Yet for a teen movie of impromptu cafeteria dances and unconvincing stand-up successes, the endeavour has a supringly frank air of loneliness, desperation and exploitation. It doesn’t shy from the pitfalls that young people entering a career in entertainment certainly will suffer. Not as callow as you remember, yet not as joyously fun either.

6

Quentin Dupieux directs Benoit Poelvoorde, Gregoire Ludig and Anaïs Demoustier in this French cop comedy about a mundane interrogation that leaps out of reality.

For the most part this is your standard French farce… busy, comically beige, not particularly laughter inducing. Then it skips the rails in the last act… not necessarily for the better but certainly memorably. Good leads.

6

Jeremy Saulnier directs Chris Sharp, Macon Blair and Stacy Rock in this black comedy where a dope goes to a murder party for Halloween only to find he is the intended victim.

Cheaply made with the occasional visual flourish that betrays the greater things to come from Saulnier and Blair (Blue Ruin, Green Room, I Don’t Feel at Home in this World Anymore). To be honest this owes a lot to Edgar Wright, it is all cartoonish framing, crash cuts and brash characters. The heart of their influence isn’t here though, neither is the compelling gritty grip they developed into their later, far superior works. Essentially a spoof of the conceptual art world with some low budget set pieces thrown in. The people being satirised don’t generate much attraction, the thrills are adequate if sparse. Not essential viewing.

4

Paul Verhoeven directs Hans van Tongeren, Renée Soutendijk and Toon Agterberg in this teen drama about three motorcross bikers who are seduced by the same chip van worker.

A heady mixture of Breaking Away and Saturday Night Fever only with the tragedy and bawdiness of the latter amped up. Being a Verhoeven, this doesn’t play nice with sensibilities- if you are Christian, disabled, gay, carnivorous or a woman look away now. There’s bound to be something here that will shock you… yes, even you. Unlike his earlier, similar Turkish Delight though you do actually grow to like and care about these protagonists; especially poor, sexy Renée Soutendijk who has the looks, iron will and proclivities to escape her fast food truck life but not the luck. She keeps backing the wrong horse. The dirt biking sequences are exciting too, Verhoeven proving his action chops. Not for the easily offended but well worth a watch.

7

Hong Sang-soo directs Jung Eun-Chae, Lee Sun-Kyun and Yoo Jun-sang in this Korean romantic comedy about a young woman who wants to break up with the married teacher who she is having an affair with.

Haewoon likes drinking, daydreaming, dressing classically, drinking, dating academics and drinking. You certainly like her and Hong Sang-soo presents her with plenty of paths (romantic and otherwise) to look down in this crossraods moment of her life. His style has the weightlessness of mumblecore, the aura of Richard Linklater or Woody Allen. This first taste doesn’t really hit the spot as a work of genre, it doesn’t have much to say as a drama. It ambles along at it own insignificant pelt. Not for me really, I’ll give his highly praised and extensive back catalogue one more try but I don’t think I’ve discovered a new favourite director here. I’m more likely to seek out Jung Eun-Chae again as she holds the gaze even when the film switches to screensaver mode, as it often seems to.

5