Martin McDonagh directs Colin Farrell, Brendan Gleeson and Kerry Condon in this black comic drama where two friends on an Irish island fall out with deadly results.

Four fantastic performance, cute animals, fissures of violence, lyrical dialogue, fantastic location, nice pints and food for thought on how we carry ourselves in the world. I was the only one laughing in my screening for a fair bit but then everyone saw an old man’s knob and I was no longer alone. The closest we’ll get to a fable in this day and age.

8

Perfect Double Bill: In Bruges (2008)

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

Chloe Okuno directs Maika Monroe, Karl Glusman and Burn Gorman in this psychological thriller where an alienated American woman in Romania begins to believe her neighbour is spying on her.

Nice Seventies Euro horror mood here – modern restyling of Polanski, Don’t Look Now etc. Monroe is, as always, a very classy Scream Queen. She goes through about five stunning looks a day. No wonder Burn Gorman is always staring at her. He is suitably creepy too. A promising debut. If you approach it as a slow burn paranoid mystery rather than a scare-fest then it really hits a spot.

7

Perfect Double Bill: It Follows (2015)

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

Jan de Bont directs Lili Taylor, Liam Neeson and Catherine Zeta Jones in this big budget remake of the 1963 horror drama based on the Shirley Jackson novel.

So bad that Spielberg took his producing credit off it. So misconceived that Stephen King walked away from the project. The CGI is godawful. Digital is never scary. Lili Taylor is better than this but you can tell her inconsistent lead turn is the bastard child of reshoots and studio edits. The bombastic nature overwhelms the other actors. The production design of the house interiors are admittedly ornate but leave zero room for negative space. A forgotten blockbuster dud.

2

Perfect Double Bill: The Haunting (1963)

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and

Steven Lisberger directs Jeff Bridges, Bruce Boxleitner and David Warner in this sci-fi adventure where a young game designer gets sucked into the computer mainframe and leads a rebellion against a tyrannical program.

Dull gobbledygook. Look, I like the one-of-a-kind look of it and love Wendy Carlos’ synth score but.. there just ain’t enough straight line thrills here to engage the kids. Which is ironic given the visual design. I only rewatched this as homework in advance of giving Tron: Legacy a belated watch. And now this has put me off doing that.

4

Perfect Double Bill: Tron: Legacy (2010)

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

Jean Rollin directs Jean-Marie Lemaire, Franca Maï and Brigitte Lahaie in this erotic French horror where a thief finds himself hiding out in an chateau with two untrustworthy nymphets.

A crumb more accessible than The Iron Rose. This houses a tangible mystery plot, villains (well, they’re all villains really) and some simplistic but convincing period details. The sex and death all feels quite wholesome, healthy. Has that iconic poster shot of a skimpy clad beauty coming at you with a scythe.

6

Perfect Double Bill: Twins of Evil (1971)

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

David Lean directs Ann Todd, Ivan Desny and Norman Woolan in the British true crime story of a forbidden romance in Victorian Glasgow that ends in a mysterious death and trial.

A bit more sexually frank and ambiguous than you might expect from a British period film of this era. There are some good moments of scene setting (a highland fling / middle class chemists) and some well handled untrustworthy intrigue. I actually enjoyed the open ended court case that consumed the final third.

7

Perfect Double Bill: La Vérité (1960)

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

John Korty directs Warwick Davies, Eric Walker and Aubree Miller in this sci-fi spin off kids adventure where some kids crash land on Endor and enlist Wicket into helping them find their parents.

The below score is very, very generous. Caravan Of Courage really is insipid, whiny, scenes dwindle on for three times their natural life. It was originally intended as a 30 minute special that somehow got stretched beyond all practicality to feature lenth. It takes a good 45 minutes before we even set off on our The Hobbit rip-off mission. Yet this pair of Ewok TV movies are the last Star Wars of the analogue era, so the production design (Joe Johnston) in a natural environment is at the very least incredible. I love a wallop of practical world building, so quickly switched off from the kiddie plotting and just enjoyed it as an almost ambient visual experience. Now, even watched with that magnanimous sense of spirit, I was shaken into almost kicking Caravan Of Courage to death by some shockingly cheap Ed Wood level unspecial FX. The spider attack is stanky and the oldest Ewok looks like taxidermy come back to life. All in all, this largely forgotten series of Ewok spin-offs are stinkers but a Star Wars stinker is never going to be completely unwatchable or unforgiveable.

4

Perfect Double Bill: Ewoks: The Battle for Endor (1985)

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and

John Irvin directs Arnold Schwarzenegger, Kathryn Harrold and Darren McGavin in this action thriller where an undercover agent / Sherriff / witness protection ‘hidee’ infiltrates the mob and destroys it from the inside.

The plot is incomprehensible at times and Arnie should never do romance. He’s also given an unforgivable dorky haircut. The action eventually starts to come with increasing regularity and has a robust Dirty Harry / Death Wish vibe… only bigger. Arnie takes on a quarry full of bad guys while listening to The Rolling Stone. Good enough for me. Couldn’t care less about the reason why he’s there. It isn’t enough to completely justify a rather humorless and tonally off project. The big man and a slick Robert Davi visit a Trans stripclub in an awkwardly dated WTF moment. Will give Arnie his due though… you can see him becoming a better actor over the course of the film. Doubt they shot it in sequence but this seems like an essential if forgotten step in his evolution from bodybuilder to A-List superstar.

5

Perfect Double Bill: Red Heat (1988)

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and

James Wong directs Jet Li, Jet Li and Jason Statham in this action sci-fi thriller where a man is chased by his alternative self who has been crossing dimensions to kill off all his parallel lives.

Highlander meets The Matrix, only it has been done at least four times before with JCVD. Not the best showcase for Li’s physicality AND, if we are being brutal, he struggles to play two separate personalities. He either looks stressed or scowls. The motions waste Carla Gugino and Delroy Lindo somehow. The Stath’s big Hollywood debut sees him mainly spout exposition with a terrible accent… so he’s the highlight! Has that meh too smooth aesthetic of millennium pivoting soft sci-fi. Decent closing set-piece and brilliant sign off shot. “I am Yulaw! I am nobody’s bitch! You are mine.”

5

Perfect Double Bill: Timecop (1994)

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and

Geoffrey Wright directs Brittany Murphy, Jay Mohr and Michael Biehn in this slasher movie where an unknown killer is eviscerating teen virgins thus encouraging the high school population to lose it before they lose out.

Passed around various distributors in America after its original studio’s went up for sale and then Columbine, this was eventually released in an obviously heavily edited form as a TV movie. Frustratingly, this is also the version they dropped into British cinemas. You can still tell what a nasty little shocker Cherry Falls initially was before being censored. They might have taken out a fair chunk of sex and violence but the atmosphere of the thing is very 18 certificate. Closer to early Fincher in mood than most glossy Scream rip-offs. The whodunnit aspect works, there’s a nice quirky sense of humour to all the sexed-up atmosphere. Wright probably could have eked out the stalk sequences a titch more but the chaotic finale makes up for the stunted carnage in the first two acts. The recognisable members of the cast are pretty sweet, especially Murphy, and while it doesn’t reinvent the wheel, it spins on its sharpened edge effectively throughout. The seediest entry of its cycle.

7

Perfect Double Bill: Don’t Say A Word (2001)

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and