Movie of the Week: Alfie (1966)

Lewis Gilbert directs Michael Caine, Shelley Winters and Jane Asher in this British classic where a ‘Jack the lad’ begins to consider the emotional and existential destruction his treatment of many women leaves in his playboy wake.

“Are you all settled in? Right, then we can begin. My name is…”

“My understanding of women goes only so far as the pleasures.”

“But I ain’t got me peace of mind – and if you ain’t got that, you ain’t got nothing. I dunno.”

“Everyone’s entitled to secret thoughts!”

Alfie kind of became a kitsch item in spite of itself. I came to it, and loved it instantly, at the height of Britpop. It clearly influenced the looks and styles of artier pop outfits of my era like Blur, The Divine Comedy and Menswear and was a laddish nostalgic touchstone for that decade’s men’s magazines and programming presented by Chris Evans. The jazzy Sonny Rollins score that paces about like a stray dog sniffing around the posh hounds, the unreconstructed confidence, the slightly unrefined celebration of the finer things and the “cheeky” sexism seemed so vibrant at the time. It felt like 1966 and 1996 shared a nexus point in time and the fashions and attitudes seemed conjoined in a way that meant the three decades inbetween never happened. Chiming with marketing events like Cool Britannia and teeing up the slight more cartoonish rougher male attitudes of Zoo, Loaded, Nuts etcetera. There was something classier and more thought through about Alfie’s mode of gender stereotyping than just boys will boys, suits and shooters, and check out this airbrushed cleavage.

I understand why feminists hate the film, the language, the misogyny, not all of it casual or self aware. But I do feel the movie gets an overly bad rep. For we are seeing Alfie through the eyes and sometimes contradictory direct to camera monologues of a working class boy done good. He treats women as disposable and is only really interested in one thing – representing all us men whether we use tailored three pieces, flash cars, wit, kindness or virtue signalling as our way to entice the fairer sex. The original release was marketed with this tag line “Is every man an Alfie? Ask any girl!” Most of us grow out of this, evolve, but to say the attitude towards women Alfie represents has disappeared or is some musty museum piece will be laughable to most women.

There’s a transgressive quaintness about his sexism – birds, it, mumsy – but these words are chosen not just for their shock humour… he treats women like objects and at the start, can only understand them as such. The gradual change that happens over two hours is the point. As Gilbert and Caine and author Bill Naughton have conjured a caricature of male desire that slowly has his worldview questioned, torn apart, challenged. While Alfie is telling us straight to camera about his angle and armour, we witness his behaviour, reactions and shabby loneliness and they begin to tell a different story. He’s still as happy go lucky by the end, great company for the gang, but you can tell that bluster and treating of women like inferior objects has been punched out of him by close of play. Punched out of him by sharing or experiencing their sadness, pain and rejection but without having developed the emotional tools to deal with these heartbreaks.

Viewers who aren’t paying full attention, those who just see the misogynist seduce and mistreat a series of dolls, what they don’t notice is the extra layer of satire happening by stealth. For just as Alfie never considers the internal life and thoughts of those he takes advantage of, I’m guessing the middle classes who lapped this film up don’t see they are experiencing the views and opinions and feelings of a person they would just dismiss as a soulless oik on the street or down the pub. They only really like their lackeys to have a voice if it is servile, ingratiating or has ambitions to join them on their terms. The Angry Young Man cycle was just finished by ‘66 but it only celebrated over educated working class men who wanted a life less ordinary, a literary ideal of being a superior prole. Alfie stick two fingers up at that – he want the riches’ pleasures and luxuries and freedoms but he doesn’t want to write a book or fuck a French girl to achieve them. He understands how rigged the game is and fiddles it accordingly.

That kind of voice hadn’t been heard before on the big screen, and as Caine speaks it to us, in a truly fantastic performance, you can tell he relishes pulling back the curtain and showing the pretentious types that Alfie’s attitude towards women ain’t quite so different to the poshos attitude to the workers. If you read those quotes from the script I started off with they prove the nub of Alfie’s message. There’s a dozen more little lines and allusions to the importance of being self aware and processing your own ideas. We all have internal lives, secret thoughts, lies we tell ourselves, moods… it was a rarity for cinema to consider these things from the working classes were worth listening to or even existed. And Alfie unloads two hours worth of that private monologue directly at anyone who cares to listen.

Alfie is all a lot more humorous and sexy and entertaining than I’ve just made out. You can still just watch the classic as a cheeky lark. The first hour anyway. London has rarely looked better, stunning location work. I love it.

10

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

Identity (2003)

James Mangold directs John Cusack, Amanda Peet and Ray Liotta in this murder mystery where bodies start dropping at a rainswept motel.

What was a really terrific one-watcher back in the day doesn’t really seem to have much else to it on a belated revisit. There’s a top genre friendly cast here, a solid nighttime look and nice kills but nothing really snaps into focus beyond that big reveal.

7

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

Face / Off (1997)

John Woo directs Nicolas Cage, John Travolta and Joan Allen in this action thriller where mortal enemies, an obsessed FBI agent and a horny terrorist for hire, swap faces and exploit each other’s lives.

“LIKE A PEEEE-EACH!” Joins Ronin and Tomorrow Never Dies as one of the last great hurrahs of the stunts, pyrotechnics and model-work orientated OTT action extravaganzas. Minimal obvious CGI is deployed and the movie has aged all the better for it. The carnage is greedily indulged in some true genre high points of big budget violence and destruction. The reason this (almost) adult blockbuster has stood the test of time though is a committed focus on the dramatic and comedic elements. Woo and the script give unparalleled play to domestic and workplace scenes where these two blurred but opposed characters ease into the other’s life. Much humour, tension and moments of acting weirdness emerge from this immoderation towards the emotional drama of the piece. This surely has to be the most improvised and dialogue heavy release to feature a Humvee playing chicken with a private jet? Who expected a movie where a SWAT team are shotgunned on their abseil ropes like piñatas to have so much Shakespearean import?

Cage naturally runs with the ball, his schizophrenic brand of overacting suiting the mania and unhinged state of whichever part he plays. His unrestrained, fully immersed style turf up so many unforgettable moments of cool, camp and crazed. Travolta holds his own, though his doughy face and unbroken vocal range aren’t quite the match for Cage pumping his performance out of every pore of his body. Woo crowbars his beloved doves, slo-mo, sentimentality and stand offs into the mix. The duality theme of the piece harks back to The Killer nicely.

You do feel a little exhausted by it all. It is a truly overwhelming film. It is so packed with incident that there are awesome moments nobody ever talks about; the erratic teasing editing when a faceless Castor Troy awakes from his coma, the strangely tender goodbye kiss between Nick Cassevetes and Gina Gerson’s sibling psychos. Did Castor intend to shoot Archer’s son at the beginning? Did he really – REALLY – think middle aged John Travolta was just riding a carousel alone on his day off? Makes Con Air feel like Bergman. I’ve sat down to Face / Off many times, in all the differing viewing formats, and never once felt like I’ve ever had the full energy to absorb the big speedboat finale. One day I might just watch that set piece separately and enjoy it in its own right.

9

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

Carry On Nurse (1959)

Gerald Thomas directs Kenneth Connor, Charles Hawtrey and Hattie Jacques in British comedy where a group of young nurses and male patients butt head in a strictly run ward.

Not the best example of its form but the crisp black and white cinematography and a decade defined air of restraint makes this seem a little more sophisticated than later entries. None of the eventual regulars are given quite enough screen time to steal the show but equally the ropier faces can’t outstay their welcome under this scattergun system. Hawtrey has some enthusiastic little moments as the overly expressive simp enthralled by the hospital radio being pumped through his bedside headphones. Featuring brief appearances from Shirley Eaton, Jill Ireland, Leslie Phillips and the always wonderfully off key Irene Handl.

5

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

The Bridges of Madison County (1995)

Clint Eastwood directs himself, Meryl Streep and Annie Corley in this romance where a farmer’s wife and a National Geographic photographer share a brief week in love that defines their lives.

Streep’s Italian accent in this is pretty iffy. She sounds like Bela Lugosi! That aside, this is a gentle yet classy affair.

6

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

Bring It On (2000)

Peyton Reed directs Kirsten Dunst, Eliza Dushku and Gabrielle Union in this teen comedy about a cheerleading competition.

Surface level – this is just an average teen movie, very much of its era, with enough dirty dialogue for the adults, enough colour and energy for the kids. But it is very, very rewatchable. Dunst is probably the main reason for this – her lead role really plays towards her long since abandoned mainstream star strengths. Yet I can’t think of any movie that gets the unlikely combination of sweet yet salty, sexy yet sunny quite so perfectly blended.

8

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

Amadeus (1984)

Milos Foreman directs F. Murray Abraham, Tom Hulce and Elisabeth Berridge in this classic period drama following the one sided rivalry between genius composer Mozart and infuriated court hack Salieri.

Transports you to another world and celebrates everything decadent and groundbreaking about Mozart’s work. Telling his rise and fall from Salieri’s jealous and conniving point of view is the masterstroke – F. Murray Abraham runs with a gift of a role. This is an evocative production that completely enthrals you. Tom Hulce’s central performance is a little too stagey and forced… and the whole shebang is loooong. But sticking with it reaps many rewards. One of the few Eighties Oscar darlings that stands the test of time, Foreman gets the balance right between playfulness and prestige, madness and measuredness.

8

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

My Girlfriend’s Boyfriend (1987)

Éric Rohmer directs Emmanuelle Chaulet, Francois-Eric Gendron and Sophie Renoir in this French romantic comedy where two new friends wobble over which handsome man is right for them.

I overdosed a little on Rohmer over lockdown… can’t say though I ever really settled into his painstakingly sloooow rhythm or fully appreciated his low key humanistic sex farces. I know people love his films but with one or two exceptions I’m just not getting it? This was, however, one of those exceptions. A perfectly pleasant gentle, wordy rom-com. Very middle class. Very “new town”. Very C&A. I especially appreciate his commitment to getting beautiful young French ingenues into swimsuits in the shortest amount of runtime possible.

7

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

Consenting Adults (1992)

Alan J. Pakula directs Kevin Kline, Kevin Spacey and Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio in this yuppie in peril thriller where the mysterious new neighbours encourage the boring nice folks next door into insurance fraud… then wife swapping… then HOLY SHIT!

A batshit mental forgotten thriller but not a particularly good time. Nobody behaves or reacts in a way that could be construed as believable. The plot developments jerk forward out of nowhere, leaving you discombobulated rather than engaged. There is so much we are not being shown, or that is given so little screen time, you feel something is being obscured in the service of some ultimate revelation… but eventually it just all sums up to an uzi gun battle. Really? An uzi!? Lessons learnt: 1) That is the very worse way to do a wife swap. Tantamount to rape. 2) Spacey cooks here. Though many of his lines of dialogue have taken on darkly hilarious double meanings since #metoo. 3) This feels like an awful parodic rehash of American Beauty at times, so weird it came seven years earlier. 4) I had to google whether femme fatale Rebecca Miller was Marilyn Monroe’s daughter. She isn’t. She could be. 5) Erotic thrillers should have at least some nudity in them. All in all; A cheesy car crash that I reckon those involved thought might be in the running for Academy Award buzz. Hubristic but never boring.

5

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

Bringing Out The Dead (1999)

Martin Scorsese directs Nicolas Cage, Patricia Arquette and John Goodman in this bleak black comedy where an insomniac NY paramedic can’t seem to save anyone over three traumatic shifts.

A swan song. The very last time Scorsese worked on this kinda claustrophobic urban character study scale. Everything over the last twenty years has been pointedly epic and sprawling. I guess The Departed and The Wolf of Wall Street have the same satirical black heart. And Shutter Island is as self contained and geographically limited – but the intention there is very much grander and more baroque. Bringing Out The Dead feels like the last gasp of young punkish Marty who trapped us in his city, his religion, his paranoia, his addictions, his night. No one else harnesses the night like Scorsese – the moon under water becomes the neon lost in a dirty puddle. Mean Streets. Taxi Driver. After Hours. A character study, a working grind, an existential hell. I wonder if he and Paul Schrader ever have a light conversation? Make small talk?

The acting is pretty exciting. All of it coming at you in discordant speeds and volume. Cage is worn out, subdued… we don’t really see him this internalised that often. The Schrader written narration probably is a misstep. A part of the formula from previous successes that doesn’t need to be carried over in this instance. Patricia Arquette feels ethereally out of time with her Catholic schoolgirl look and whispered wails of dialogue. John Goodman, Ving Rhames and Tom Sizemore bring the colour as Cage’s three alternating ambulance partners. Each one tramples over the lead’s neuroses and sanity with their big parasitic personalities. After being set up as such the agent of chaos in his brief appearances before the third act, it feels a shame we din’t get more of Sizemore’s violent psycho, Captain Tom. By that point the narrative is shaking loose its structure to do artier things. The background ensemble has people you’ve never logged doing fascinating work; Afemo Omilami, Mary Beth Hurt and early appearances from The Wire’s Sonja Sohn and Michael K. Williams. A pantomime of bad behaviour.

You could see it as raking over old ground… it was marketed somewhat bluntly as Taxi Driver in an ambulance… ER meets Catch-22. It works best as a very dark comedy. The second half has issues. Scorsese struggles to find anything new to say after a rush of setting up imagery and moods. He ends up repeating motifs until the movie just shuts down and dozes off. But that first hour now feels like a last hurrah. We are running red lights, popping meds and blasting Johnny Thunders. Scorsese might have matured but I haven’t. This is the cinema I want. I’d take the relentless and manic first half over a thousand Kunduns and Silences. You can’t put your arms around a memory!

8

Check out my wife Natalie’s Point Horror blog https://cornsyrup.co.uk

We also do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/