Lloyd Kramer directs Lindsay Lohan, Grant Bowler and Theresa Russell in this romantic biopic of the on-off Hollywood romance between Liz Taylor and Richard Burton.

And then this happened. And then this happened. And then this happened. And then this happened. And then this happened. Plotted like a Wikipedia entry, there’s little to like about this TV movie where fallen star Lilo plays original scandal attracter, Cleopatra herself. The scenes move way too rapidly for her to do anything much more than look beautiful in Liz Taylor drag. Yet the story is chopped up by a few scenes set in a black box theatre where an out of time Burton and Taylor reminisce to camera. These mannered separations work, and Lohan feels like she’s putting in a markedly better performance during these interludes. The bulk of the film has no grain or heft, it is just a series of vapidly condensed incidents. Yet there’s camp pleasures in the budget opulence recreated. And bless her for all her public trouble, Lohan is an old school movie star who dominates the screen, even at half strength, even in tosh like this.

4