Bradley Cooper directs himself, Lady Gaga and Sam Elliott in this third remake of the new talent overtakes famous lover rock romance.
So this… THIS… is the front runner for the best picture Oscar? I went in open minded, open hearted, ready to be conquered. I was ready for Lady Gaga not to be the best actor in the world (I’d spent 10 weeks watching her awkward turn in American Horror Story: Hotel). Hell, it is not like Cooper is a particularly dynamic screen presence either. But at times this was laughably bad. The poor Parisian cinema goers who heard us chuckle uncontrollably through another sweary, laboured round of dialogue. Was Dave Chapelle going to say “Bro” at the end of every sentence? Do regular folk think endless scenes of smearing cream on each other’s faces is intimate? No one really thinks songs just come together like that and can be performed unrehearsed with a band and a small town’s worth of people eagerly watching , do they? Don’t have LG perform at a drag revue as her intro… it is just too on the nose! This is going to be a heavily spoofed and parodied film. Not just as it can be camp and awful at times, but because it is iconic. It will capture the general public’s imagination. And it ain’t all bad. Sure the talkier interludes are stinkers but the concert moments have a rush of energy. The editing is pleasingly off key. It jerks around a bit. But this twitchy cutting captures the thrill of facing your fears, realising your dream… hell, falling in love. Sam Elliott does a ton with a little. The songs are memorable belters. Cooper the director has a relaxed framing style and a strong sense of colour that captivates. But as a product… and this is a product… base Hollywood… It is just The Bodyguard ain’t it, really? Killer album sales, fluffy yet random movie attached. But that shouldn’t be critically lauded. It shouldn’t win no gongs after Christmas. And just who is Dave Chapelle’s character… a man whose garden Bradley Cooper likes to regularly visit for a drunken shit and a sleep. Is that his character?