Richard Wenk directs Chris Makepeace, Grace Jones and Dedee Pfeiffer in this horror comedy where some wannabe frat boys go to a strip bar run by an ancient vampire queen.

Porkys meets Big Trouble In Little China. Grace Jones is barely in this, even if it was all out marketed on her 10 minutes of salted screentime. She does some interpretive dance in front of a Keith Haring designed chair. The male leads are charmless jocks… real oiks… strange that the script goes through such hoops to justify them going to a titty bar?! Their lack of ability capsizes any goodwill you have towards this largely forgotten horror comedy. The pink / green lighting design is pretty expressionistic. And Dedee Pfeiffer as the sunny possible love interest / possible wolf in good girl clothing belongs in a better version of this film. She almost makes it worth watching. As “One Crazy Night” flicks go it has none of the charm of say Adventures In Babysitting but there is one tense sequence involving a killer lift. A release that might be remade today into something far superior without offending anyone.

4

Perfect Double Bill: Fright Night (1985)

My wife and I do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

Zalman King directs Mickey Rourke, Carré Otis and Jacqueline Bisset in this erotic romance where a naive lawyer goes flying down to Rio to close the big deal for her matriarch boss only to fall for a mysterious business tough.

Nice on location footage of carnival and Brazil. This bides it’s time quite uncertainly until the epic fuck scene at the end. It exists in the mucky overlap between Emmanuelle and Eyes Wide Shut but has none of the beauty of either. Rourke feels underserved, Otis can’t act for toffee but Bisset rocks and you kinda wish the movie followed her. Chaotic.

4

Perfect Double Bill: Two Moon Junction (1988)

I write regular features about live comedy for British Comedy Guide here https://www.comedy.co.uk/people/bobby_carroll/features/

Martin Scorsese directs Willem Dafoe, Harvey Keitel and Barbara Hershey in this cinematic life of Jesus.

Very controversial in its days and you can see why. It is a film that both the Pope and Patrick Bateman would find much to mull over. And for Scorsese fans it is often has the same forward propulsion and (slightly misplaced) machismo of a Raging Bull or Goodfellas. Harvey as Judas via Brooklyn? Love it! Dafoe is excellent. And when Christ comes down from the cross and things get apocryphal… I really dug it. Jesus fantasising about deliberate sin. Yeah… it’s a hot potato. But I’m now mature enough and agnostic enough to appreciate the mastery of the form. So seductively spare and with such bold colours. When it comes to the gospels, this is the greatest story ever told.

8

Perfect Double Bill: Kundun (1997)

My wife and I do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

David Slade directs Elliot Page, Patrick Wilson and Sandra Oh in this thriller where a teenage girl catfishes a nonce.

A calling card movie that launched a lot of careers but doesn’t hold up to all that much scrutiny on a revisit. It goes for fraught and extreme but feels quite idle and whimsical. Pulls punches too often.

5

Perfect Double Bill: Little Children (2006)

I write regular features about live comedy for British Comedy Guide here https://www.comedy.co.uk/people/bobby_carroll/features/

Adrian Lyne directs Ben Affleck, Ana de Armas and Tracy Letts in this high end erotic mystery where a wayward wife drives her rich husband to extreme measures.

A strange fish of a movie. Affleck and de Armas both look hot in grey, but because he’s the cuckold and she is given some plausible deniability in the edit, there‘s very little sex. C’mon Lyne, 20 years off and only one shot of Daredevil rimming a Bond girl… very poor. This is wealth porn, the community they live in is eerily strange. Suburban hedonism, every party feels like a daytime swingers event that forgot the viagra. Real Don’t Worry Darling vibes. When threats, stalking, deaths by misadventure happen it feels quite humdrum. Almost as if Ben Affleck’s poker faced husband has nothing better to do with his day than stonily live up to some fatal gossip. He does love his snails… weird. An update on a Patricia Highsmith novel, this plays its cards close to its chest for a beat too long to have any real fun. As a one watcher, it looks a billion bucks and guessing the psychological motivations of the blank characters is a decent motor but once the cat is out of the bag… well… there is very little that would entertain on a second watch.

5

Perfect Double Bill: Knock Knock (2015)

My wife and I do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

John Musker and Ron Clements direct Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Brian Murray and Emma Thompson in this Walt Disney animation that takes Robert Louis Stevenson’s Treasure Island into space.

An oft rollicking adventure with a pitch perfect voice cast and impressive character design. Jim and John Silvers relationship is tender and fascinating. Winning Saturday Morning Cartoon stuff.

7

Perfect Double Bill: Big Hero 6 (2014)

I write regular features about live comedy for British Comedy Guide here https://www.comedy.co.uk/people/bobby_carroll/features/

Zalman King directs Sherilyn Fenn, Richard Tyson and Louise Fletcher in this erotic drama where a southern debutante begins an affair with a brooding carny.

All steamy atmosphere, all cheap style. And even if the minimal plot gets bored with itself, Richard Tyson is about as appealing as a trucker’s gusset and this is low art… Two Moon Junction scratches an itch. A Channel 5 late movie itch admittedly but it does the job. Sherilyn Fenn always makes a movie for me, the support cast is deep but classy and those strange little nonsensical diversions have a quirky mystery to them. Travelling fair real-politics, bisexual truckers, dead dog disposal, lashings of soft core humping. Better than it has any right to be and just the perfect amount of sleazy.

6

Perfect Double Bill: Wild Orchid (1989)

My wife and I do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

Martha Coolidge directs Nicolas Cage, Deborah Foreman and Michael Bowen in this teen romance where boy and a girl from different Eighties sub-cultures fall for each other.

Outwardly a bubblegum teen romance that benefits from existing just a forgotten moment before John Hughes really nailed down and defined the genre. There’s a lot of accidental nostalgia here but also abrasive edges that really make Valley Girl stand out. If you want mall fashions and new wave music then this has it for you. Yet it is also sexy, and sexually frank, without ever feeling like exploitation. All the characters land a little more shaded, grounded and complex than is needed. Except Michael Bowen’s possessive jock who is just a muscle bound control freak. Then you have early Cage. His character’s actions do border on stalking but there’s a reality to his anger at being dumped and his clumsy failures at winning his dream girl back. And some of his wilder improvisations are kept in over the scripted material. Which is amazing. He has lovely chemistry with Deborah Foreman who is very winning in the largest role. Valley Girl gets so much right and doesn’t feel utterly beholden to the teen romance rule book that was being written around the same time. I melt with you.

8

Perfect Double Bill: Night Of the Comet (1984)

I write regular features about live comedy for British Comedy Guide here https://www.comedy.co.uk/people/bobby_carroll/features/

Molly Manning Walker directs Mia McKenna-Bruce, Lara Peake and Shaun Thomas in this British coming-of-age drama where three 16 year olds go away on a package holiday.

Again starts off a bit Grange Hill but does really capture the alienation of being on one of these holidays, outgrowing certain friends and what a depressing experience losing one’s virginity can often be. Has some pretty rough going sequences in the last half hour.

7

Perfect Double Bill: Rocks (2020)

My wife and I do a podcast together called The Worst Movies We Own. It is available on Spotify or here https://letterboxd.com/bobbycarroll/list/the-worst-movies-we-own-podcast-ranking-and/

Emma Seligman directs Rachel Sennott, Ayo Edebiri and Ruby Cruz in this teen comedy where two reject lesbians start an after school fight club to touch the girls they fancy.

First half hour I just wasn’t sure. Bottoms plays at a heightened energy that I couldn’t really sync into. Everyone is up at 11 playing a hardcore stereotype. If you thought Heathers or Clueless operated in their own hyper reality then, boy, do I have a movie for you. Pretty much all that I was connecting with was the retro Nineties fashions. But then I got to pace with it, started looking forward to various members of the deep ensemble returning for their little bits and started laughing. NFL player Marshawn Lynch consistently got me as the laidback teacher and I’m always gonna have time for Rachel Sennott. Here she glams down and does her take on the Jason Lee role in early Kevin Smith movies. The soundtrack is popping, the ending apocalyptic and while I’m not sure Bottoms always coheres as a satire it has cult item written all over it. And I’m there for that.

8

Perfect Double Bill: Shiva Baby (2021)

I write regular features about live comedy for British Comedy Guide here https://www.comedy.co.uk/people/bobby_carroll/features/