Bobby Carroll's Movie Diary

Clint Eastwood directs John Cusack, Kevin Spacey and Lady Chablis in this true crime drama where a puff piece magazine writer stays to cover a murder trial when his flamboyant millionaire host is charged with killing his working boy.

Not as tiresome as I remember. Though as a teen I was probably expecting something a bit more Grisham and a lot less flaming when I rented the VHS. It almost doggedly does not have the thrust of an airport novel. More a Savannah hangout movie which is stolen away from the A-Listers in the second half by Lady Chablis. The Lady Chablis, also known as The Grand Empress and The Doll, was a transgender club performer who Clint gives a sympathetic and generous eye to. She plays herself and is allowed to vamp and be human as her mood and the meandering story dictates. Not that the notorious Kevin Spacey doesn’t hold the attention. He sure is a charismatic bastardo. I miss him in films and his part here is retroactively on the nose irony supreme. Bless his gropey little heart. There actually isn’t enough of him really. Both Alison Eastwood and Paul Hipp make you wanna write one of those “Where Are They Now?” letters to Empire. If this awards bait movie had captured the public’s hearts and minds a tad more in 1997 then they’d both be household names now I’d wager. But, alas, pretty much every character is queer or straight washed so it had no real currency then or has even less today. Compromised. One of Clint’s lost experiments. Did you know this has been adapted into an Off-Broadway musical? Best thing for it.

6

Perfect Double Bill: Where The Crawdad Sings (2022)

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Peter Yates directs Albert Finney, Tom Courtenay and Edward Fox in this backstage drama where a fey assistant tries to keep his tyrannical employer, a mentally fading Shakespearean actor, on the rails for one last performance of Lear.

A filmed play. My least favourite medium but given the theatre setting we can give this one a pass. Two full fat, high camp performances that rollick against each other. It is dark but I chuckled a lot. I wonder if The League Of Gentleman lads love this. The camp and mutually assured destructive marriage of monsters feels like a massive part of their DNA.

7

Perfect Double Bill: Noises Off (1992)

James Glickenhaus directs Robert Ginty, Samantha Eggar and Christopher George in the NYC Vietnam vet vigilante flick.

The one-sheet promised a flame thrower wielding, motorbike helmet flexing, spin on Death Wish and Taxi Driver. The Death Wish comparisons hold up. Half the budget is blown on a Vietnam death camp prologue. Hueys buzz around between plumes of gasoline explosions, Stan Winston pulls off an early decapitation effect. Then the credits! The only way is up once we hit the streets of the Big (rotten) Apple, right? Not really. The first act is confusing. Ginty is such a charisma suck non-presence that it comes as a surprise once he emerges as our psychotic anti-hero. The evil fodder is ghastly and sleazy but short lived. There’s a bike chase but very little flame thrower. Eggar and George are the best things in it. Enjoying their own little completely superfluous side movie. Trash that is inches away from being very entertaining but that dead chubby faced vanilla lead fumbles it.

4

Perfect Double Bill: Exterminator 2 (1984)

I write regular features about live comedy for British Comedy Guide here https://www.comedy.co.uk/people/bobby_carroll/features/ and my own Substack https://substack.com/@edinburghlaughterbulletin

Yorgos Lanthimos directs Emma Stone, Jesse Plemons and Willem Dafoe in this kinky anthology where the same cast plays different roles in mini dramas that are deadpan power plays about control and desire.

Every world has its flawed god. The first story is cruelly amusing, the second the most provocative and the third drags. Perception plays a huge part in how you relate to each of these and the second story works as it slowly dawns on us that we have been backing the wrong protagonist from the start. Tales Of The Unexpected with flashes of nudity and perversion. How much you are into sad faced fucking and manipulative control is on you. If you loved Lanthimos’ earlier Greek efforts this well made 3 hour indulgence might tickle you more than it did me.

6

Perfect Double Bill: Alps (2011)

Mike Nichols directs Meryl Streep, Jack Nicholson and Jeff Daniels in this drama where a magazine writer marries a cad journalist.

Exactly the type of movie that I would have watched on TV as a kid, not understood and therefore it didn’t gel into the long term memory banks. You see they used to make movies just for adults back then. And us nine year olds just sat through the infidelity and tiffs as the swearing had been dubbed out. The entertainment would have been seeing two great performances, a witty script and some wealth porn. The melodrama is a bit hard faced and it doesn’t help the overall mood of the piece that Jack steals every scene. The reality of the situation is of course he is fucking around. What else are you bringing to bed but a load of neuroses and a big sharer bowl of pasta. Jack had to get his. Fans of Ephron’s later, more magical, rom coms might find this a bit too intellectual and tough skinned. I’m actually not sure it is as smart as it thinks it is.

6

Perfect Double Bill: The Devil Wears Prada (2006)

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Jonathan Demme directs Juanita Brown, Roberta Collins and Barbara Steele in this women in prison exploitation flick from Roger Corman’s New World Pictures.

Early exploitation Demme that, one or two scenes aside, doesn’t feel all the predatory. The first hour is a grindhouse Orange Is The New Black. The last twenty widens out and amps up the action. All the inmates have quirks and heart. Still fulfils what the dirty mac brigade would have required back then… and at least one of those scenes of sexual threat is quite abrasive. On the whole though… fun.

6

Perfect Double Bill: The Big Doll House (1971)

Gary Fleder directs Andy Garcia, Christopher Walken and Gabrielle Anwar in this dark crime ensemble comedy where a slick gangster needs to wrap up his affairs quickly after a mob boss puts a hit out on his crew.

As a teenager this was in heavy rotation on my VCR. A derided flop in the States, I feel (with no real evidence) it was more fondly embraced and financially successful in the UK. Just like Reservoir Dogs was when it banked more cash in its original run over here than across the Atlantic. It has quotable dialogue, quirky characters, easy cool and a hip soundtrack. Now the dust has long since settled and not many (if any) of the kneejerk Tarantino rip-offs have stood the test of time, this stellar cast and hilariously nasty script actually shines brightly. It looks fantastic and moves with a purpose. Garcia is only this in sync with his material in The Godfather III and here. Treat Williams and Walken are outlandishly memorable monstrosities. The living thing is both meta and full of heart. Sheen but breathing. Boat drinks, Jimmy The Saint!

10

Perfect Double Bill: Con Air (1997)

I write regular features about live comedy for British Comedy Guide here https://www.comedy.co.uk/people/bobby_carroll/features/ and my own Substack https://substack.com/@edinburghlaughterbulletin

Francis Lawrence directs Cooper Hoffman, David Jonsson and Mark Hamill in this dystopian road movie where fifty young men take part in a contest of walking endurance; one where 49 of them will be executed when they slow down.

One of Stephen King’s simplest but most haunting novels. Filmed gruesomely. With two of the best young actors out there currently, front and centre and eating up the focus. Horrific in its own cruelly inevitable way but joins Shawshank, Stand By Me and Hearts In Atlantis as one of the superior “non-horror” King adaptations. Surprised this didn’t breakout to a wider audience.

8

Perfect Double Bill: The Running Man (2025)

Cameron Thor directs Justin Lazard, Johnathon Schaech and Moon Unit Zappa in this drama where a group of friends reunite at a mountain retreat only for tragedy to (briefly) interrupt their self centred whining.

Top billed Christina Applegate turns up for three minutes, promptly kills herself by hanging herself with a swing. Then her mates dump her body in the woodshed and carry on with their affairs, pot smoking, arguments, pranks and blah blah blah. There are flashbacks to a sexual assault and both Molly Ringwald and Paul Gleeson are in it. Every other scene is smothered in some horrible dirge-y singer songwriter crap. Might just be the worst movie I have seen. The Big Nil.

1

Perfect Double Bill: The Room (2003)

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Chris Nahon directs Jet Li, Bridget Fonda and Tchéky Karyo in this French martial arts actioner where a Taiwanese cop is framed by some Parisian ACABs.

Li’s best stunt work in a western production, he shines when he is wordlessly in motion, taking down all of France with a picture postcard backdrop. Fonda is served up a doozy of a role as… deep breath… a junky whore farm girl white slave with a heart of gold and a kidnapped daughter. This is very much made through the prism of what producer Luc Besson feels both ‘cool’ and ‘femininity’ are. A wayward mess but satisfyingly packaged. Saturday night takeaway.

7

Perfect Double Bill: Unleashed (2005)